STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Did I mention I need more cherries on my cancer sundae? Well, I got them. Two of them.

#1 My genetic testing (BRCA) came back positive. I have a mutation in a gene that normally protects the body from developing cancer.  This means my breast cancer risk is 85% and my ovarian cancer risk is 23%. The mortality rate for ovarian cancer is approximately 20%, and I was told I have to make a decision about my ovaries in a year to a year and a half after I get through the breast cancer crap. I learned this a day before my surgery which helped validate my decision.

#2 I received a call from my breast surgeon yesterday to talk to me about my pathology report. As you may recall, I had 3 locations of cancer in my right breast and the left breast was elective because of my high risk.  The flesh that was taken from the left breast was screened for cancer. They found there was cancer in the left breast as well - DCIS - the same kind of cancer that was found in my right breast. Finding out there was in fact cancer in both breasts REALLY validated my decision for the bilateral mastectomy. It also scared the shit out of me - it's like, where the hell else do I have cancer that they were unable to detect through a regular screening...

When they performed surgery on my right side, they took lymph nodes for screening and those came back clear (my right arm pit is completely numb but also the source of a lot of pain - odd). I asked the surgeon if my lymph nodes needed to be biopsied for the left side and she said no, as it was unlikely that it spread there, as it was for my right side.  I just have to keep a close eye on my pits and get biopsied if anything funky happens I guess. I do have an appointment with her on the 25th - I'll bring a list of questions then.

Anyway, since my lymph nodes came back clear, I will not undergo chemo or radiation (yea!) Seriously, I've lost my boobs and I don't want to have to lose all my hair too.

Some have asked how I am feeling.  I'm in constant pain and it hurts to breathe and laugh. Thus, I am on painkillers constantly.  I have the most energy in the morning but get the spins from the medication for the rest of the day. I spent most of yesterday trying to not throw up.  I have very limited mobility which increases steadily. The stress of everything has my hair falling out a bit, and the BONUS of not getting my period for some reason (yea!) Oh, and I have around 10 lbs. of water weight/fluids from the surgery and I feel like a beached whale.  I had two drains attached to me, the left one was removed on Monday (yea!) and the right one is still on . I reeeeealy want the right one removed before the weekend. I refuse to go out and be social with a container of body fluid hanging off of me

My hospital stay was interesting. I ended up staying 2 nights. The second night I was there an older woman was placed in the bed next to me. She was a total passive-aggressive attention monger. The entire freaking night, instead of hitting the nurse button for assistance, she would slowly get out of bed and yank her tubes out which would set off this LOUD alarm which the nurses apparently couldn't hear, so I had to hit the nurse alert button each and every time this happened since she wouldn't. This repeated itself every 20 minutes or so until 5 in the morning at which time I think they gave her a sedative.  The next day, anytime a nurse came to tend to me, she would do it all over again - how dare I receive medical attention - SHE'S the one that matters! Whiny, complaining, passive aggressive bitch ahhh... that feels better

Yes, I was a very cute hospital patient with my poptart mickey mouse buns.  I also discovered that I don't have a hospital-conducive robe - everything is a short lingerie number.  My husband had picked up a burgundy silk dragon motif kimono during one of his trips to Japan which was a bit flamboyant, but perfect.  I must have been quite the sight during my walks with my flashy robe and perkily bunned hair

My bandages were also removed on Monday. It's kind of hard to look at, but it'll be ok. The waiting room at the plastic surgeon's office was full of mastectomy reconstruction patients. One woman (who was 31 when she was diagnosed and was celebrating her 5 year cancer-free anniversary), offered to show me the Dr.'s "work."  We went into the bathroom and she showed me (a bit odd, but I appreciated it).  She looked really good and there's no way you would ever know with her clothes on either (she was wearing a low-cut top). 

Apparently my breast surgeon made what are considered small incisions which is supposed to be a good thing (guess it makes the plastic surgeon's work easier) and that I am "healing beautifully."

That's the latest in my saga - thought I'd share. Thanks again for all your well wishes.  The next time I post about this will be to decide to go with a B cup or a C cup... don't know if I should do a general interest or style poll on that one...