the title should have been - how would you feel, but I didn't want to copy linny
well, just talked to L, who is in Italy, and who told me - I am going to have dinner with my mom, then I think I am going out with R (I know him), and blah blah blah... and then
and tomorrow at 10:30 I have to go get a shiatzu massage from my friend D (a girl). He is doing it as a favour to her b/c she just got her degree or something and she needs to practice
so, I ask, am I totally insane being so jealous? I am a pretty jealous person to start with, but this thing is really driving me nuts! He says - if I knew you'd be upset, I wouldn't have told you (yeah, and when I found out, what could I think?) but I told you b/c there's nothing to hide.
And then - I am really not interested in her, you know I am only interested in you (yeah, but she's there I am 6000 km away)
and then - what do you want me to do, not go? If you are upset I am not going (mmm - I was really tempted to say - don't go, but then I thought I shouldn't be telling him what to do and not to do)
So, I know what the result will be: I am gonna wake up at 4:30 in the morning, for some reason, and start thinking about him that in that precise instant is getting a massage from D
Am I really crazy? How would you girls feel about it??? I am pretty sure being far away makes this worse, but I am feeling pretty bad, guess I just need a word of confort
i am pretty easy-going about stuff with my husband, but i have to admit, getting a massage from another lady, school or not, might not sit well with me!
that said, i have gotten a massage from a friend who was finishing her studies, and it was very professional. i even had to fill out paperwork afterwards!
You're not crazy or insane for being jealous. Who wouldn't be in your situation? But I guess the question is - do you trust him? If you do, then you'll have to deal with your jealousy on your own because to be honest, you wouldn't want him telling you who you could hang out with and what you could do (especially if you consider it a favor for a friend) and I'm sure he would feel the same way.
That said, if he knows it bothers you, he probably shouldn't do it. He shouldn't do it without you having to ask him not to.
If it makes you feel better, I'm worse than you. There's this local news reporter who my bf thinks is cute and I refuse to turn to that channel when it's news time. That's pretty insane.
I wouldn't care. I have actually scheduled massages for my BF with women massage therapists before and he has scheduled them with men for me. Of course, I am not at all jealous and neither is he. This person is a professional and I don't find the professional massage experience to be sensual or sexual. I only find it to be completely relaxing.
Not exactly the same thing, but how would you feel if he got mad because you went to a male ob/gyn?
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"Whatever you are, be a good one." --Abraham Lincoln
I understand not really liking this, but I don't think you have to worry about it. People who want to be masseuses (sp???) have to log in a certain number of hours before they can get their accredidation, I think. I would go to any one of my guy friends who needed to accumulate hours, unless I got a weird/flirty vibe from him in the rest of my life.
Unless they have a past, or one of them is romantically interested in the other... I think you can let it go.
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Fashion is art you live your life in. - Devil Wears Prada | formerly ttara123
My thought on these kind of things is always if he's going to cheat on you he'll do it whether or not you say he can get a massage from this girl. And if you think he would cheat on you then you shouldn't be with him anyway.
ttara123 wrote: I understand not really liking this, but I don't think you have to worry about it. People who want to be masseuses (sp???) have to log in a certain number of hours before they can get their accredidation, I think. I would go to any one of my guy friends who needed to accumulate hours, unless I got a weird/flirty vibe from him in the rest of my life.
Unless they have a past, or one of them is romantically interested in the other... I think you can let it go.
I agree. I might be jealous, too, but I don't think that you actually have anything to worry about.
Maddie wrote: My thought on these kind of things is always if he's going to cheat on you he'll do it whether or not you say he can get a massage from this girl. And if you think he would cheat on you then you shouldn't be with him anyway.
This is true.
Do you ever go for professional massages? I have been to many different massage therapists and not one of them has been anything but professional. I love a professional massage but the experience, for me at least, does not even come close to being sexual. That said, I have only been to female massage therapists AND my BF has never had a massage by either male or female.
I don't think you are insane for feeling this way--LDRs are difficult--but I don't think you should let it bother you.