STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Just where exactly was the camera crew this evening when I needed them?

I really thought that I'd seen it all with the morons that I've been dating, but tonight might just be the be all and end all to dating idiocy. Here's the scoop...

It's Halloween and my friend C and I decided to go to a local bar that was having a costume party. She and I are just planning to go and have a good time. She's married and I'm convinced that all men are morons, especially the ones that lurk in bars, so we aren't planning on meeting anyone there. We end up hanging out near the dance floor and from across the room, I spot a dead-ringer for Johnny Depp (and you all know how I feel about Johnny). Seriously. I almost thought it was him for a second and then I realized that I was in East Bumblef*ck and that just wasn't possible. Just for shits and giggles, we'll call him JD.

So, I see JD checking me out from across the room. JD makes his way over to me, along with his group of friends-- 4 guys and 1 girl. He and I end up talking and I'm attempting to assess if he's married or not b/c I'm getting a sixth sense kind of vibe. But whatever, I've had a bad week and I don't care (that story deserves it's own post). We hang out the entire evening and really hit off and have a lot in common. Not to mention, every five seconds someone is stopping him to tell him that he looks like Johnny Depp. I'm getting high-fives from people who think I'm his girlfriend b/c all everyone is talking about is how he looks exactly like Johnny Depp. I'm getting a taste of what it may be like to be famous, or at least date someone who is and it's completely insane.

But the whole evening, I can't shake the married vibe for some reason. He's swearing up and down that he's not married, not dating anyone, completely single, but I'm not buying it. But I still don't care b/c I've had the shittiest week ever.

So, it's the end of the night and he tells me that he wants to see me again. He gives me his number, which he says is his home number and I give him my number. We say goodbye, I go home and b/c I'm insane, I decide to do a little online research.

First I check out the phone number. It's legit. Home number, his number. Then I decide to search for him on myspace. Bingo! I find him. And he's married! But wait, he's not just married. He's married to the GIRL WHO WAS WITH HIS GROUP OF FRIENDS!!!! WTF???? Seriously? She was there the whole time. We actually left the group for a while and went into another part of the building. He gave me his number right in front of her. WTF??

I'm not sure if I should laugh hysterically or swear off men forever, but this is a seriously messed up night. But honestly, I needed the distraction anyway and I had fun and I got to hang out with a guy who looks like Johnny Depp. So, it wasn't all bad, I suppose.

Men are messed up.