STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

cc · Marc Jacobs

would you give a wedding present...

Cortney1982 · Chanel

I would not give a gift if they specified not to. A card thanking them for inviting you and your best wishes to them is best.

Hermes

I would respect their request and not give a gift. Perhaps sending flowers a day or so before the gathering to congratulate them would be a nice alternative gesture. If you decide you do want to give a gift, I would have it sent to their home vs. giving it at the luncheon to avoid making guests who did not bring gifts, as well as the bride and groom, uncomfortable.

NCshopper · Hermes

I wouldn't give a gift. Do you know if they have any charities they give to regularly or any causes that may be near and dear to their heart? If so, you could give to a charity in their name, which I think would be nice.

erin · Chanel

i agree with the no gift to luncheon, but maybe a bottle of wine delivered at home?

shopgirl82 · Chanel

i plan on not having any gifts at my wedding and i hope people respect that. i might just pick a charity because i know people will want to give something, so i think that is a good way to go as well.

if you feel like you want to give him a gift, maybe do it for a different occassion such as a birthday, 1st year anniversary, or even after coming back from a trip (hey, i saw this and thought of you type of thing).

Alikat · Kate Spade

My friend's wedding was like this and I gave her a bottle of port from a local vineyard.

twinkle · Coach

I would make a donation to a charity and have the card sent to their home.

Kelly · Hermes

I agree with the charity thing or the flowers

Farrah · Marc Jacobs

ttara123 wrote:

I agree with the charity thing or the flowers

Love the charity idea and the flowers. I think that both wouold be a nice gesture.

cc · Marc Jacobs

I had thought of the charity idea (that's what I did for my other friends who specified "no presents") but the only meaningful charity I could think of was a cancer charity (both the groom's parents died of cancer) and I know even though he would appreciate it, it would also make him very sad and bring up bad memories and I don't want to do that when he is starting this great new chapter in his life.

My original plan had been to get a membership to the Guggenheim museum because they both love art and the membership includes admission to the location in Venice, where they are going on their honeymoon. All my coworkers thought it was a perfect idea and I guess it is sort of like a charitable donation (it's tax-deductible) so I think I will just go ahead and do that.

Thanks!

littlebean · Kate Spade

I think that you should respect their wishes and flowers, wine, etc. all honestly seem like gifts to me so I don't think you should get them. Personally, I think that the best way to mark the occasion is to make a donation to a charity in their names. Just my two cents, though!

I have no idea what you or they are interested in, but I frequently make donations to Heifer International to mark weddings, birthdays and other holidays for people that are impossible to find gifts for! I think that it's a unique and worthwhile charity. They work to end extreme poverty by promoting self-reliance in the developing world by giving lifestock and training to poor individuals. So you can give a cow or a flock of chicks or a pig, etc., depending on your price range. They have fun gift cards you can print up, too! Their website is www.heifer.org. Hope that helps!

Hermes

cc wrote:

I had thought of the charity idea (that's what I did for my other friends who specified "no presents") but the only meaningful charity I could think of was a cancer charity (both the groom's parents died of cancer) and I know even though he would appreciate it, it would also make him very sad and bring up bad memories and I don't want to do that when he is starting this great new chapter in his life.

My original plan had been to get a membership to the Guggenheim museum because they both love art and the membership includes admission to the location in Venice, where they are going on their honeymoon. All my coworkers thought it was a perfect idea and I guess it is sort of like a charitable donation (it's tax-deductible) so I think I will just go ahead and do that.

Thanks!

I love this idea, cc! I would send it to them outside of the party, though. I did not receive gifts for my wedding, but would have been thrilled with that gift (if I lived in NYC) - especially since it includes admission to the Venetian location for their honeymoon. It's a thoughtful gesture, and I bet they'll love it. It is for a good cause too: art. Usually when people say no gifts it's because they don't need any material items and just want their friends to celebrate with them. Gifts from the heart (in that it's not expected from you, and you are giving a gift in the spirit of celebration), like this, mean more than just getting what is traditionally expected (for me at least).

AllieGurl · Marc Jacobs

twinkle wrote:

I would make a donation to a charity and have the card sent to their home.

My thoughts exactly!

kittenheels · Coach

The Guggenheim idea is great! I am sure they will really appreciate your thoughtfulness.