STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

It's ok. It's ok. It's ok. And I'm not just saying that, I filed a sexual harassment complaint against aboss who, among other things, masturbated himself with my chair, and they made me make a statement three times, sitting next to him or across from him every time.

This is what helps me: Smile, even though it's on the phone. Write down the points you want to make - there was no documentation of misconduct, you wer told it was a layoff, you have four witnesses, you have all the documents the company gave you (You would have had to sign any indication of misconduct) and whatever else Esquiress told you, right?

And if you have to say anything to the company rep, pose it as a question: "Do you have any documentation?" Not "I know you don't have any documentation." Makes the same point without you looking bad... Don't take ANYTHING she says personally. She's not describing you, she's going to either be describing someone she's only heard about, or repeating something she was told to say. Again, if you want to challenge anythign she says, pose it as a question, "You thought my work was not up to par? Do you have this in writing anywhere?" "You heard I was a discipline problem? Exactly what incidents made you think that?" ALWAYS make her defend her statements, don't do her job for her by defending yourself. It always makes you look guilty. Just keep asking questions and it will be OK!

Other than that, just stay calm. It helps to keep telling yourself you like the person, you understand where she's coming from. She's just caught in the middle. So save your anger for the people who really deserve it. Once this is over, you can write a letter to the editor or something about how awful they are, or burn a wiccan candle to give them their kharma, so it will go somewhere. Just keep telling yourself you'll have a chance to do somethign about that later, though, and focus on what you have to do now....

Does that help? I really hope it helps because, like I said, I've been there and it's not easy.

-- Edited by Dizzy at 17:49, 2006-06-05

I'm confused Carrie. I thought you took the church job so are you still eligible for unemployment?

Don't let their crap rattle you. You know (and we know!) that you are in the right. Just answer calmly and honestly, and confidently (even if you feel nervous or sick). You're on the side of the angels here. I'm sending you positive thoughts. I hope it's over quickly and you can put that damn company behind you and move on with your life. *hugs*

esquiress wrote:

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Whatever you do, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT admit to surfing the net or doing anything else wrong. As far as you are concerned, you were a model employee, you were told you were a model employee, no one ever told you you did anything wrong. end.of.story.

if you admit to any wrongdoing whatsoever, you will only be helping them. put it this way--if you admit it, they don't need any documentation saying so because you just did their work for them.

good luck and know that we're with you.

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Oh yeah, I definitely don't plan on incriminating myself! What do I say if that's what they say the reason was though?

hey carrie... good luck!!!

Write things down you want to say.  Whenever I make an important phone call I write things down so I don't jumble my words or forget stuff!

good luck carrie.  let us know how it goes.  the other girls have had great advice on what to say.  i like the tip on smiling and you may also want to get dressed like you are going to a real meeting.  it may make you feel more professional.