STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
stylethread site home page -> stylethread forum -> relationships -> a girl who wants to be friends when you don't
Post Info TOPIC: a girl who wants to be friends when you don't
scarlett


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2117
Date:
a girl who wants to be friends when you don't
Permalink Closed

I put "a girl" in the topic line so it wouldn't look like I meant a guy I'd dated.

There's a girl I went to college with who wants to be friends with me, but I am not really interested in being friends with her. We were introduced by a mutual friend a few years ago and at first I did enjoy her company and we did things together, but as I got to know her better I felt like we just weren't a good fit as close friends. For one, I think she wanted to make me over into a wilder person, and she used to encourage me to do things like go home with random guys from bars, things like that. So I distanced myself and we haven't hung out in almost three years.

Today I got an email from her asking if I wanted to hang out. This is a new email address she didn't have so she must have hunted it down somehow, I think from our mutual friend. I wrote her back with a brief update on my life and she responded, again asking if I wanted to do something next week. I don't have ill will towards this person but I don't want to get in some cycle of hanging out again when I'm not interested, really, either. We're both going to the wedding of the girl who introduced us later this summer.

I hate this kind of thing. I hope I'm not coming across like a jerk here. I could use some advice on handling it!

eta: I should add that it's already hard enough for me to see friends with the way my schedule is these days, and I'd rather keep my free time for people I really want to spend time with. But I don't want to be mean either.

-- Edited by scarlett at 13:24, 2006-04-05

__________________
http://fugitiveduck.blogspot.com/
Aurora


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2408
Date:
Permalink Closed

I think you ought to tell her what you just told us (the edited part).  That your schedule is just too hectic right now to make firm plans and you wouldn't want to cancel on her (just lie here) but you are looking forward to seeing her at the wedding this summer and leave it at that.

__________________
My blog -> http://www.theblondediaries.com/

http://twitter.com/blondediaries
Elle


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 7139
Date:
Permalink Closed

Aurora wrote:

I think you ought to tell her what you just told us (the edited part).  That your schedule is just too hectic right now to make firm plans and you wouldn't want to cancel on her (just lie here) but you are looking forward to seeing her at the wedding this summer and leave it at that.
Agreed.  Perfect .

__________________
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment ~ {Ralph Waldo Emerson}
scarlett


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2117
Date:
Permalink Closed

Genius idea! That's what I'll do. Thanks!

__________________
http://fugitiveduck.blogspot.com/
honey


Gucci

Status: Offline
Posts: 2818
Date:
Permalink Closed

i agree with the others. honestly i feel like life is too short (trite i know) to waste time on people that you don't really care about. but i'm a mean girl so maybe i'm not the best person to give advice.

__________________
www.musingsfromamall.com  (my main blog)
http://musingsfromamallinreallife.wordpress.com/ (my personal style blog)
D


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 8209
Date:
Permalink Closed

honey wrote:

i agree with the others. honestly i feel like life is too short (trite i know) to waste time on people that you don't really care about. but i'm a mean girl so maybe i'm not the best person to give advice.
I don't think you're being mean thinking this way, just being true to yourself.

__________________
"Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess." ~ Edna Woolman Chase
D


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 8209
Date:
Permalink Closed

Elle wrote:

Aurora wrote: I think you ought to tell her what you just told us (the edited part).  That your schedule is just too hectic right now to make firm plans and you wouldn't want to cancel on her (just lie here) but you are looking forward to seeing her at the wedding this summer and leave it at that. Agreed.  Perfect .
I agree too.

__________________
"Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess." ~ Edna Woolman Chase
JoceyBaby23


Gucci

Status: Offline
Posts: 2744
Date:
Permalink Closed

honey wrote:

i agree with the others. honestly i feel like life is too short (trite i know) to waste time on people that you don't really care about. but i'm a mean girl so maybe i'm not the best person to give advice.
I agree with this. (Not that your mean, honey.. lol) but that life is too short to waste time.

__________________
-jocey-
scarlett


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2117
Date:
Permalink Closed

I agree with this too. A friend told me once that when you get to adulthood and its attendant busyness, you shouldn't feel obligated to spend time with people unless you really want to.

__________________
http://fugitiveduck.blogspot.com/
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
stylethread site home page -> stylethread forum -> relationships -> a girl who wants to be friends when you don't
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard