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valenciana


Dooney & Bourke

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applying to grad school - letters of recommendation
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this may have already been discussed...and i know something similar was already discussed...by me...doh.  but i'm literally at my wit's end.  i'm applying to grad school, and i put it off way too long, and now the app is due Feb. 1...yikes.  so i need three letters of recommendation, and i must ask people asap.  i'm just having a lot of trouble coming up with three.  here are the contenders:


former supervisor - totally nice, really liked me, before i quit my job she offered to do anything like this for me, this one is a given


former crazy big boss - before she decided she hated me, she adored me (embarassingly so), but then towards the end of my time working for her, she seemed to warm up some and even gave me a hug on my last day of work (and that is sooo not like her) and offered to be a reference for me, the only possible cons are: a) her recommendation might be less-than-stellar and b) her hatred of me started when i turned down her offer to pay for my grad school, and now i'm going to grad school, *and* in a completely different field...


college professor - the one college professor i had much of a relationship with, i know she liked me, but i don't think i really stood out in her classes, she did serve as a reference for me when i got my previous job (3.5 years ago) but then i feel like, it's been almost 4 years since i had any contact with her, it might just be weird or presumptuous to ask her, if she even remembers me...and what if she actually doesn't remember me


guy i worked for in college - he would definitely remember me, he was always happy with my work, i know he'd have good things to say about me, but this was a college summer job...can you tell i'm grasping for straws? do you think the admissions committee would be able to tell too?  he is a college professor, if that carries any weight with other college faculty types...


friends - is this a totally off limits area?  it's not like i would have a friend be my only reference, but they certainly know me.  i guess their opinion of my intellectual abilities might be worth less than a teacher's.  i do have two close friends who are in very closely related fields to what i'm pursuing.  one of them was technically my college classmate in my major which is also related to the grad program.


i have only had one job since college, there are possibly other people from that job i could also ask, but i don't think it would be wise for all three of my recs to be from that job.  i just don't know how valid old college professors opinions are 4 and 5 years down the road.  so, i guess what i'm saying is, are any of my potential references valid and usable?  or am i screwed?  i guess i should point out that the application asks them to rate me on a list of academic/intellectual abilities and then asks for a brief statement/letter, so they'd have to know me well enough to have something to say about me, besides that i'm not some criminal or something.


can you all tell i'm needy and nervous about this?  it's been like 8 years since i applied to college, i feel like i have no idea what i'm doing.


eta: it's a school counseling program that i'm applying for...very touchy-feely and all that...not a businessy type of program at all.  other departments within the school specify that the recs have to be from supervisors, professors, etc. but this one does not make any specifications whatsoever.



-- Edited by valenciana at 11:12, 2006-01-05

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honey


Gucci

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it depends on what type of grad school you're applying to.  right now i'm submitting apps for business school and for references they said they prefer supervisors, co-workers, etc. or anyone who can speak about you in a professional capacity. college professors are okay, and definitely not friends.


if it's something more academic, i think a professor would be fine -- even ideal reference since she can speak about your capabilities. 


i think esquiress posted something about this (her dad is a prof? maybe, can't quite remember) and she said most prof. don't mind filling out recs and it's pretty much expected (esquiress, sorry if i'm putting words in your mouth).


one tip (that i picked up from various info. sessions) is to kind of prepare a cheat sheet for your recommendor and give it to them when you ask for the rec. basically it should cover why you're applying to grad schoo, what you've been up to, what you want to do with your grad school degree so they have a frame of reference when filling out the app.


hth.



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halleybird


Hermes

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I'd ask your former supervisor, your college prof & the guy you worked for in college. I'd skip the big boss. It doesn't seem like the benefits of that one outweigh the risks. I'd avoid using friends. If it's school counseling (as in guidance counseling), they are going to want proof that you work well with people and are very organizing. If it's counseling as in psychology, they're going to want more academic references. Honey's suggestion of a cheat sheet is great -- I did this for one of my English profs who is writing me a letter (I needed an English prof, and I was not close to any of them. His response was something to the effect of, "um, OK, and who are you again??" LOL). But I learned the hard way that a cheat sheet can be a good thing...I had another prof write me a letter a few years ago, and he clearly had me confused with someone else. It must be funny to work in an admissions office!



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valenciana


Dooney & Bourke

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thanks for your help girls, i feel much better.


the cheat sheet is a great idea, that way, if my old prof doesn't remember me, she can at least throw something together, and even if she does, it gives her idea of what i want said about me...heh...and cuts down on her work a little.


halleybird...you still applying for that english program?



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esquiress


Marc Jacobs

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yup, that was me.  my dad and all the other profs i know are always happy to write letters of rec/be references, whatever.  they don't even bat an eyelash.  also, don't underestimate yourself or their memories, even if you don't think they'll remember you or that you didn't stand out or whatever, you might be pleasantly surprised.  and don't worry that its been awhile, lots of people take time off to work before going to grad school.  good luck and keep us updated!

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halleybird


Hermes

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valenciana wrote:
halleybird...you still applying for that english program?
I am...sending the final stage of my application next week.

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