STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Metric · Gucci

oh lord

tara t · Marc Jacobs

oh, i'm so intolerant of that type. maybe you can say," look sister, as soon as you finish this, this, and this you can go home, i see that you are having a hard time right now, but i really need this done... so that is my only compromise. "

hopefully she will be in better shape tomorrow.

-- Edited by tara t at 15:43, 2005-12-12

nicoley · Coach

That seems like an icky situation. I am all about keeping personal and work completely seperate. Im not sure where you work at, but this seems totally unprofessional to me, and somewhat immature on her part. Maybe she is just trying to get attention inadvertently? Shes seems emotionally unstable, but the best thing to do would be to explain to her that there is alot of work to get done, and maybe you could talk about the personal issues after work (even though im sure you dont want to.. it might just sound more polite)

luckylily · Gucci

I agree w/ Nicole. Certainly there are times when it is difficult to hold back the tears at work, but she's taking it too far and it is really unprofessional.

Are you her supervisor? If so, I'd deal with her today by telling her she can go when x is done. When things have settled down, I think you should have a sit down with her and explain that it isn't appropriate. It is probably really disruptive for everyone else.

That's my best thought...I really think someone should tell her to quit being such a selfish brat, but that doesn't really work too well in the work place.

Dizzy · Marc Jacobs

Ouch. She obviously has ISSUES. I can't imagine what life is like for her if crying in her cubicle is the best way she can think of to get attention for her pain. Um, I think if you say something, you could end up in trouble, so you might want to consult legal for this one. Then I would put it like "Obviously you have some personal things to take care of, and you will of course want to take care of these at home..." and offer her unpaid time off. It should snap her out of it pretty fast. If you think she's being more than self-indulgent, or needs psychological help, you could recommend that she use whatever resources your company has, too. But it has to be clear that if she's at work, she's only doing work.

Maybe this sounds harsh, but she can't be allowed to bother everyone like this. It's like a four year old throwing a tantrum. They can be upset, but they can't bother the other kids with it. They have to handle it on their own in a time out... She's sort of getting away with manipulating everyone here. And letting her isn't doing her any favors because it's doing so much damage to her reputation. Sheesh. I hope she feels better soon. And poor you to have to deal with her! Wow.

Oh, if you're not her boss, I would just say something like "You are being so brave to come here when you're obviously dealing with so much. You should go home." Then keep being insistent and say things about how you're sure she wants to keep it private. It will give her the strokes she wants. She'll love you forever. It will count as a mitvah or something. And she'll get a hint that personal things should be personal. But you might never get rid of her, so there's a down side... I know someone is going to advocate talking to her directly, but she's obviously not going to be able to handle that, so i think it would be cruel. And probably rebound on you in some awful way, too. She's a big four year old. You can't expect four year olds to handle adult conversations. And you dont' want them mad at you because they tend to be out of control. Anyway, good luck!

-- Edited by Dizzy at 19:28, 2005-12-13

blubirde · Chanel

What happened? What'd you end up doing?

Btw, I would have had NO patience for that kind of behavior. I would have told her to go home and count it as a sick day (not pity days for me). Okay, that sounds harsh but if it were a habit with her, then I'd be unsympathetic. If it was a rarity, I'd be MUCH more sympathetic.

Metric · Gucci

blubirde wrote:

What happened? What'd you end up doing? Btw, I would have had NO patience for that kind of behavior. I would have told her to go home and count it as a sick day (not pity days for me). Okay, that sounds harsh but if it were a habit with her, then I'd be unsympathetic. If it was a rarity, I'd be MUCH more sympathetic.

I am such a chicken shit. I hid out in my office all day and by mid-afternoon she was calmer but snivelling. I am totally unsympathetic to the whole situation and not having alot of experience dealing with staff before I have no clue how to handle it. Both staff that I supervise are criers- to the point where if I use the wrong "tone" or don't answer a question immediately its time for tears. Its really quite rediculous.

Then this moring she came in all Mary Sunshine like nothing happened I am getting so done with my job.