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Alikat · Kate Spade

dreams about ex-boyfriends...

Luv2Shop · Kate Spade

I have dreams about ex's sometimes. They are very intense and sometimes seem very real, like I have the feeling in my dream that I am cheating on my husband with them and I feel so wrong and guilty about it in my dream, and then I wake up and I am like "whoa, that was a dream, I am sooo glad!"

I think it just has to do with old feelings and memories we have for ex's. We were with all of them for a reason, and because we liked them and were attracted to them, no matter why we broke up with them. I don't think that ever goes away all together, it's just back there all the time, and your subconcious may bring those feelings up every now and then.

Also, I think it's our minds way of letting us be naughty in our dreams so we don't get bored or feel the need to cheat in our real life relationships. Our minds just enter people we have had feelings for or are attracted to like ex boyfriends, crushes, and hot celebrities.

Just my opinion! I wouldn't worry about it at all.

Alikat · Kate Spade

Thanks for the reassurance, I'm feeling better already. It just takes a few hours to shake them off....

I guess it just creeps me out to have such intense feelings while I'm in a relationship with someone else! I know that if I saw them in reality, though, I wouldn't have the same feelings.

jacL · Coach

I have also had dreams of exes and they make me feel so weird! Sometimes, they will just play a bit part but other times they will be the main focus. Anyway, I totally agree with Luv2shop's take on the dreams. They may give you the shivers, but they are nothing to worry about.

CarrieS · Marc Jacobs

I would assume it's normal. I had a dream about an ex (the only one I've ever loved) once and in it, we were getting back together. I was disturbed when I woke up *shudders*...

bumblebee · Coach

a way to think about dreams that is helpful is just that they are your mind's way of sorting through all the crap that you don't have the time/inclination to actively think about while you are awake. if you really thought consciously about every piece of information or thought or person or situation that passes through your sight/thoughts every single day, you would go insane. it's just too much to process. so while you are alseep, your brain sifts through all of it, filing away some things that might need to be re-examined later, and throwing out everything else.

anyway, so my advice is to not think too much about it--it probably doesn't mean what you think it does.

Andrea Julia · Coach

CarrieS wrote:

I would assume it's normal. I had a dream about an ex (the only one I've ever loved) once and in it, we were getting back together. I was disturbed when I woke up *shudders*...

Ugh! Hate when that happens!

I also dream about exes every so often. No matter how badly things ended, things are always going really well between us in my dreams. My dreams will just take the good qualities they had and leave out the bad, making the relationship perfect. Sometimes I wake up feeling depressed that the dream wasn't real even though I would never want to get back with them in real life.

Alikat, I assure you that it is completely normal. My married friends have dreams about their exes before and even wonder about them in waking life. It is just human nature to think about and remember those you have loved. As long as you are not feeling an itch to get back in touch and it is not making you have doubts about your current relationship, there is really no problem.