oh sweetie. i'm so sorry. he sucks. this sucks. i'm angry/sad for you too. anyway, i'm at work right now but as soon as i finish this project, i'm calling you. hang in there, ok? and know that we love you.
shopchicago33 wrote: oh sweetie, i'm so sorry to hear that. do you care to share what he did, or prefer to keep that to yourself? If you need to vent - we're here.
Awww, you girls are so sweet! (sniffle, sniffle)
Here's a nutshell version of what happened: the date was nothing special (it was nice and pleasant and all but nothing special, which is what I was looking for). We go back to his place and I told him I liked him (against my better judgment and with the aid of a few grapetinis - yum). He said he liked me too but basically not as much as he *should* and he thought he didn't like me as much as I liked him - wtf?? The worst part wasn't that he said that, although that's bad, but that he spent the rest of the evening going out of his way to be incredibly sweet and loving.
I think, no I know, that the boy likes me. I'm not stupid enough to pursue something with someone who shows zero interest in me. But he's either 1) not willing to admit to himself how much he likes me or 2) doesn't know what it means to like someone.
Anyway, his reasoning doesn't matter. I'm not willing to wait around while he figures it out. I deserve more than someone who's "not sure." So yeah it sucks but whatever. It's his loss. I'm sure I'll feel worse later on but for now I'm just a tiny bit pissed off that he's lacking a typical male anatomical structure: his balls.
so i don't know if this is going to help....and i don't even know if i should post this because i might sound crazy....
but this morning when i got home from work (36 hours in 72 hours....just to help explain things), i read through the forum to help me unwind and to go to sleep....i think your post must have been one of the last ones that i read, because i had this dream, that you were running to catch the train (i didn't see your face, but in my head i was like, "oh no, there goes blubirde. i have to tell her something...")and i was chasing after you on the platform and you were like, "i have to go catch the train..." and then i was like, "wait, i just have to tell you one thing....", so you hopped on the train, and i just had enough time to tell you, "i'm sorry about your boy...." that's all i remember about the dream.
crazy, huh? i always remember my dreams and i have weird dreams, but this was definitely a bazaar one, since i've never met you, but i when i did read this post this morning i really was sad because i wanted it to work...
anyways, as i told my friend who just broke up with her bf (and i don't tell everyone this...)
i'm not worried about you, and i don't think most girls on here are, because i have confidence in you that you will meet someone truly amazing (if you haven't already met him) because you have so much to offer. honestly, some people you just can't say that about....but you're not one of those people.
anyway, i hope that helped a bit, and don't think i'm crazy!!
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"i tell you one lesson I learned
If you want to be something in life, You ain't gonna get it unless, You give a little bit of sacrifice, Oohh, sometimes before you smile you got to cry.." -The Roots
i'm not worried about you, and i don't think most girls on here are, because i have confidence in you that you will meet someone truly amazing (if you haven't already met him) because you have so much to offer.
shopgirl82- that was beautifully said and I totally agree with you.
blubirde- I am so sorry it didn't work out for you. I was really rooting for you too. If he wants to be wishy-washy with you and not be completely honest with you, then he doesn't deserve you. It's his loss. I hope you're feeling better.
shopgirl82 wrote: i had this dream, that you were running to catch the train (i didn't see your face, but in my head i was like, "oh no, there goes blubirde. i have to tell her something...")and i was chasing after you on the platform and you were like, "i have to go catch the train..." and then i was like, "wait, i just have to tell you one thing....", so you hopped on the train, and i just had enough time to tell you, "i'm sorry about your boy...." that's all i remember about the dream.
I don't think that's crazy at all! I have dreams all the time where people pop in and out, weird and all. I think it's sweet I made it into your dreams. Now if only Brad Pitt knew who I was so I'd make it into his!!!
shopgirl82 wrote: i'm not worried about you, and i don't think most girls on here are, because i have confidence in you that you will meet someone truly amazing (if you haven't already met him) because you have so much to offer. honestly, some people you just can't say that about....but you're not one of those people. anyway, i hope that helped a bit, and don't think i'm crazy!!
That's really such a wonderfully sweet thing for you to say! The vote of confidence is so very appreciated. Isn't it odd how if someone else thinks you can do a thing, that it suddenly becomes easier to do the thing?
Actually it's kinda funny because I'm sitting here watching Celebrity Fit Club on VH1 and the trainer has a commercial that says to "get off your fat ass and get fit" instead of watching celebrities get fit (or something like that). It cracked me up. 'Cause I'm sitting on my fat ass typing on the computer watching Celebrity Fit Club. I'm just saying, if B list celebrities can go on tv at the cost of their pride to lose weight and make life changes, surely I can deal with a little heartbreak, right? (Heartbreak is using for dramatic purposes, not literal ones. )
But seriously you girls... I can't begin to describe or put into words how wonderful y'all all are. I honestly got choked up a little reading y'all's posts of sympathy and support. I don't know if it's the type of women that ST attracts or if ST brings out the best in women but I can't imagine people being better and more amazing than they are here. Awww, I love you guys!!!
Thanks for the support and kindness. It means so much.
OH NO!!!! I just read your post and knew exactly what you meant by the subject line. I'm so sorry he screwed it up. That really sucks. I'm glad you talked about it all with him though--it wouldn't have been fair to you to continue on in the relationship if you didn't have a clear idea of what he was thinking.
Man, that sucks! I was definitely pulling for you two!
I'm not willing to wait around while he figures it out. I deserve more than someone who's "not sure."
Good. This is just one girl's opinion, but please, please remember this a week or three weeks or two years down the road when this guy is crawling back to you with all of his regrets. In my experience, there are some guys so terrified of what they will have to "give up" by liking someone that they can never see what they will gain. And when they finally decide they are "sure" it is motivated by fear of being alone, not love.
I'm so sorry this happened, but I'm more sure you're going to meet someone great. Someone who isn't a chicken.
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Forget, forgive, conclude, and be agreed. - Shakespeare
totally agree with shopgirl82. i am flabbergasted that he is not overjoyed about your confession. I've never even met you and I can tell you are an amazing catch! What part of "fabulous girl" is he not getting?
did he say that it's over, or that he doesn't want to continue seeing you? because from what you wrote, it sounds to me like it's not over in his mind yet, especially given the fact that he spent the rest of the evening being sweet and trying to show you that he cares about you. i think maybe you shouldn't take it too seriously.
sometimes early on, boys freak themselves out when they like someone and they back up a little because they feel in over their heads. it really sounds to me like maybe this guy just had a little panic moment, but that he's not saying that he's not into you. in fact, it kind of sounds like he is, but we are not to blame for taking them at their word, of course. i don't know your situation that well, but what seems to be helpful is to pay more attention to what they do and less attention to what they say. it seems like he just has to tell himself that he's not having a relationship, while he is currently having a relationship, until his brain catches up with his heart.