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blubirde


Chanel

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should I say something? *not so special update*
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I just got back from New Orleans for a wedding with a friend (J) this weekend. I had the best time. I was recapping it for a blog on myspace - so all you myspacers can check it out if you want - and I realized it was such a great weekend because of J. We've been friends for awhile but spending a weekend away together really lets you see a different version of someone, don't you think? We've always kind of hooked up and what not but we never really talked about dating or anything serious like that. We both date other people (obviously).


But he was so sweet this weekend. He helped me with my luggage, insisted on going back to the hotel when I was tired (even though we were hanging out with his friends), left the wedding when I wanted to (it was one of his good friends and oddly enough the brother of his serious ex-girlfriend). Of course I only wanted to because towards the end of the evening the mother of the ex and the groom started introducing us to family members and proceeded to whisper, right in front of both of us and by both of us I mean me, that Jay was the guy they wanted the ex to marry. Uncomfortable! And might I say rude? Anyway, I digress.


So now I'm going away this weekend to visit a friend and he'll be gone the two weeks after that for his own vacation with a friend (a guy friend thank goodness). Should I say something to J about how I'm feeling? I'd love to go away this weekend knowing neither of us was going to kiss someone else. Is that silly? He's mentioned us dating once or twice before (not seriously just in passing) and he always says, "but you aren't into relationships." So I'm not sure if he's open for the possibility or not. If I say something will I blow it and just end up feeling like the weekend meant more to me than him? I'm so nervous.


What do you girls think?


And I swear I'm not this boy-crazy, it's just that a lot of stuff has been happening at once lately.



-- Edited by blubirde at 13:20, 2005-07-19

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poptart


Coach

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RE: should I say something?
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Tell him, tell him, tell him! Oh, this is so cute!

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splash


Kenneth Cole

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Lisa wrote:
Tell him, tell him, tell him! Oh, this is so cute!


That's about how I reacted too!

Yeah I think that you should say something. Maybe his mentioning dating but saying that *you* weren't into relationships was hinting that he was interested but figured you weren't.

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Grace


Dooney & Bourke

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I've learned that you regret what you don't do rather than what you do do.  So say something!

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member


Hermes

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Grace wrote:

I've learned that you regret what you don't do rather than what you do do.  So say something!
I totally agree w/Grace.  You have to say something blubirde!!!  Let us know how it turns out

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lsubatgirl


Gucci

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I think you should say something! If you've talked about it before and are still friends I think mentioning it again won't hurt anything.  Maybe you can say something about being ready to take him up on his offer...


Funny how when its someone else we all say go for it but when its you yourself all the nerves come out! I am the same way!



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kenzie


Chanel

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Grace wrote:

I've learned that you regret what you don't do rather than what you do do.  So say something!
DITTO!!! Say something! If you don't, you may wonder what-if for the rest of your life.

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blubirde


Chanel

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Okay, so I should say something. Should I say it via email (we email all day at work), via IM (we IM if we're both at home), telephone, or in person? The only problems with in person are that 1) I'll see him on Tuesday but at a bday party, which is not the time, 2) I'll be incredibly nervous, and 3) I'm not sure I'll be able to say it - he's the only person in the world who makes me hold my tongue. With most people I just blurt and blurt, with no thought of the consequences. With him I actually give thought to what I'm saying and find it difficult to say serious things.


Argh!!!! <-- That's me venting my pent-up feelings of nervousness, anxiety, etc.


What if he doesn't feel the same way? I'm not sure I could hang around him and continue to be as good of friends with him if he doesn't reciprocate. I'd probably feel humiliated.



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blubirde


Chanel

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AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!


He just wrote me that he's coming over tonight to watch some show I recorded for him (at his request b/c he doesn't have a vcr) and I told him I'd cook dinner - a disaster all on its own. And then he said he'd go home afterwards. (He specifically said that part.)


Now I'm emailing him back that he can stay over if he wants!!!!!! That ought to be a clue, don't you think? I wonder what he'll say back...



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Grace


Dooney & Bourke

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Say it (e-mail, im, phone, in person...) which ever makes you the most comfortable and however you'll be able to get it out the way you want to say it.  Start out the conversation with what a good time you had and go from there.  Don't drive yourself crazy with "what if's". 

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Grace


Dooney & Bourke

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Let things happen all by themselves....

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Christine


Coach

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blubirde wrote:
AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
He just wrote me that he's coming over tonight to watch some show I recorded for him (at his request b/c he doesn't have a vcr) and I told him I'd cook dinner - a disaster all on its own. And then he said he'd go home afterwards. (He specifically said that part.)
Now I'm emailing him back that he can stay over if he wants!!!!!! That ought to be a clue, don't you think? I wonder what he'll say back...



Bluebirde, you have to keep us posted! I am dying to find out what he says back!

By saying he'd go home afterwards, he was probably just trying to be a gentleman and not make it sound like he expected that you'd be ok with him staying over.....



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esquiress


Marc Jacobs

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ok coming in late on this one and sorry if i've got this confused but isn't J the guy that said you were "embarassing" and that you went on too many rants and you guys got into an argument and you were trying to decide if you should apologize and we were all like he's the one that should apologize--is this J that guy???


if so, did he ever apologize and mend that situation?


 



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blubirde


Chanel

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esquiress wrote:

ok coming in late on this one and sorry if i've got this confused but isn't J the guy that said you were "embarassing" and that you went on too many rants and you guys got into an argument and you were trying to decide if you should apologize and we were all like he's the one that should apologize--is this J that guy??? if so, did he ever apologize and mend that situation?  

That's the same guy - what a fantastic memory you have!! And yes, he apologized and said he didn't mean it like that at all. I still give him a hard time about it every now and then but he was really sorry he upset me and that he said it. I guess he doesn't think I'm embarassing if he asked me to a wedding to meet all his good college friends and his ex-girlfriend, right?


And he actually comes around a bit on me ranting. We've both given a little, I suppose. I try to not get overly dramatic about little things (still working on it) and he tries to listen to my p.o.v. with a bit of patience and understanding. So far, so good. We haven't fought one time since then. If you can even imagine it!



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blubirde


Chanel

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blubirde wrote:

AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! He just wrote me that he's coming over tonight to watch some show I recorded for him (at his request b/c he doesn't have a vcr) and I told him I'd cook dinner - a disaster all on its own. And then he said he'd go home afterwards. (He specifically said that part.) Now I'm emailing him back that he can stay over if he wants!!!!!! That ought to be a clue, don't you think? I wonder what he'll say back...

Damnit! He said he couldn't stay over. Actually here's the gist of it:


Me: You could bring some clothes and stay over, if you want. I promise to
let you sleep. ; )  (He's still very tired from our weekend trip to NO.)


Him: I'll just go on home tonight after the show.  I think it's just easier
that way.  Although I have no doubt you'd let me sleep. heh. ;)


That's not entirely encouraging is it? Now I'm rethinking me saying something. Maybe I should just hold my tongue...



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Grace


Dooney & Bourke

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Wait and see how it goes tonight...got any wine at home?



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blubirde


Chanel

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Grace wrote:

Wait and see how it goes tonight...got any wine at home?
I'm going to the store after work, so I'll get a bottle. Or maybe I'll get a chimay for him (his favorite beer).

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Mandy


Kate Spade

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blubirde wrote:

Him: I'll just go on home tonight after the show.  I think it's just easierthat way.  Although I have no doubt you'd let me sleep. heh. ;)
This is a weird thing to say.  Maybe he felt that there was something there this weekend too and he doesn't want things to be awkward or he's feeling a little freaked out.  I would wait and see how he behaves tonight.  (I'm really disappointed at this too, because I so wanted you to say something )

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Grace


Dooney & Bourke

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Good luck!  Just let things happen on their own...it always seems to work better that way.  Rather than trying to plot or plan.

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blubirde


Chanel

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Mandy wrote:

blubirde wrote: Him: I'll just go on home tonight after the show.  I think it's just easierthat way.  Although I have no doubt you'd let me sleep. heh. ;) This is a weird thing to say.  Maybe he felt that there was something there this weekend too and he doesn't want things to be awkward or he's feeling a little freaked out.  I would wait and see how he behaves tonight.  (I'm really disappointed at this too, because I so wanted you to say something )
I think he meant because of getting up for work in the morning. He goes to work at 7:30 and lives about 5 seconds from work. I go to work at 9 and live about 15 minutes away. At least that's what I'm hoping he meant...

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