STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
stylethread site home page -> stylethread forum -> general chat -> Keep having guilt...
Post Info TOPIC: Keep having guilt...
CarrieS


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2364
Date:
Keep having guilt...
Permalink Closed

Okay, I went on vacation last Wednesday, and (to make this as short as possible), I was in a minor car accident on the way there: I was super tired and dozed at the wheel for a few seconds, causing my car to drift and slam the side into a guardrail on the interstate.

Everyone is fine and so is my car (unless you count the $3846 worth of damage to the side of it). I'm extremely lucky that this wasn't a more serious accident, and I do mean EXTREMELY lucky. I still, even a week later, cannot get over the fact that I actually did that while driving.

The guilt factor comes in when I start thinking about any other trips I might take with people: All I can think of is "Nobody is going to want to ride in my car with me because all they'll be thinking of is how I could possibly cause another accident". This makes me feel horrible (and I suppose it should, since I was stupid in not pulling over my car sooner and making someone else take over driving for awhile). I really can't stop thinking about it, plus I keep replaying the exact moment that my car hit, over and over in my head.

I'm personally not afraid to drive or anything, because this was a freak accident (had serious insomnia the night before leaving---has happned only one other time in my life)and I've never done anything like this, nor am I a reckless driver.

I suppose when any accident happens that other people are involved in, guilty feelings arise. I just feel bad about the whole thing.

Thanks for letting me get that out.....

__________________
Head back, arms down, and hold on!
esquiress


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2053
Date:
Permalink Closed

oh my gosh, that must've been terrifying!  thank goodness everyone's ok!  anyway, don't beat yourself up, it was an accident after all.  it's just one of those things you have to take as a lesson learned and never let happen again.  don't worry carrie--we still love you. 

__________________
blubirde


Chanel

Status: Offline
Posts: 4845
Date:
Permalink Closed

how terrible! i've fallen asleep at the wheel several times. (that sounds bad but it's true - sometimes i have sleep issues and i keep weird hours.) never for a long period of time but i've dosed off and caught myself almost immediately. it hasn't happened in a long time, but that could have been me. even with people in the car.

i wouldn't worry about what they think about you. everyone knows it could happen to almost anyone. if anything, maybe it will alert them to the possibilities and be better "active" passengers. i insist on people i'm with to do things to keep me awake if i'm tired. i try to do the same on drives where i know the driver is sleepy or if it's been awhile on the road.

i wouldn't judge anyone for an accident like that. it happens and i'm sure most people can very easily put themselves in your position and be sympathetic.

besides if they're rude to you, come tell us and we'll go over and kick their asses!!! (online, of course)

__________________
http://dailypointers.blogspot.com/
laken1


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 5600
Date:
Permalink Closed

Oh no, you poor thing. Please don't feel bad - how many times do people "almost" get in an accident & no one ever even knows? I know I have done that countless times. I think it is a good tap on the shoulder, just consider yourself lucky that you had an angel with you!

I had a wreck a few years back - no one was injured, but I did about $4500 worth of damage to my car, and I know that I was scared to drive for months & months. Every time I got in my car I wondered if I would make it to where I was going. I think it's a very terrifying experience & you really shouldn't beat yourself up.

Maybe just sharing will make you feel better! Come back & talk about it again if you need to.

__________________
Who do you have to probe around here to get a Chardonnay? - Roger the Alien from American Dad
lynnie


Chanel

Status: Offline
Posts: 3612
Date:
Permalink Closed

This happened to my bf, i was in the car, and so was his friend in the backseat.  We had driven for four hours and had just gotten off at our exit- it was 2am.  His friend was sound asleep, i had tried to stay awake, but I had just started to drift off in the last 10 mins.  Well, he fell asleep for a second, our car started drifting, he tried to regain control but we ended up spinning out of control and landed in some trees on the other side.  We were SOO SOO lucky there was no oncoming traffic and even though the car was totaled (and he had a newish Integra, so it was like $11,000 of damage), we had no bruises or cuts.  BUT it was a scary reminder that passengers should ALWAYS stay awake and keep the driver alert.  I never ever ever sleep in cars anymore, even if others are awake.  I'm too paranoid.  I also get very nervous to drive with anyone nowadays or to drive over 60 mph, but that is because of my own accident (someone made a left turn in front of oncoming traffic- which was me, my wrist is still fucked up- that was over 2 years ago) and because I lost control on the beltway and almost died (They were refinishing the shoulder, so a wheel dipped down, when I came back over, I lost control,  needless to say, I'm now scared of uneven pavement on a highway.)  Driving is truly more scary and serious than people realize, I know you can't live your life in fear, but so many people think that they are indestructible.  I thought I was going to die 3 times, and it is the scariest feeling in the world to think your life is going to be taken right there.  I wouldn't feel guily- I think you are lucky in the sense that this can make you more cautious of driving when you are tired, and also teach your passengers to try to keep the driver awake and make them more careful drivers themselves.  I'm sorry this happened to you, it is so terrible

__________________

my fashion/style thoughts www.poetryofpause.com 
CarrieS


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2364
Date:
Permalink Closed

Thank you guys for your replies.  It really does help! 


I was on about 7 hours of sleep between 2 days, so I was definitely exhausted, plus my 2 passengers were also asleep, so that did not help (when talking to my mom after, she kept telling me to make sure 1 passenger was always awake).  At one point, I was coming up on a rest area, and thought to myself "I should stop here and have someone else drive", but then I decided that I would make it to the next one and stop there.  Obviously didn't happen.


I'm definitely going to be evaluating my leave-time for early trips, and making sure that my body can handle it.  I'll also have to make sure to have a rotating-like driving schedule, for when I am super tired and can't drive that long.


I probably should have just gotten coffee that morning, although when I'm that tired, it can have a reverse effect and make me more tired.  The only reason I didn't is because coffee makes me have to pee really often (think about every 30 mins), so I just don't get it when I'm going on long distance driving trips because it would be a pain to stop so much.  But that would have been better than what happened.


I am very thankful that no one was hurt and there wasn't more damage to my car.  I probably would have to have psychiatric help if it was a lot worse than it was.


Once again, thank you guys!  I knew I could post here and you would be understanding; a lot of the reason I love this site so much.



__________________
Head back, arms down, and hold on!
luckylily


Gucci

Status: Offline
Posts: 2740
Date:
Permalink Closed

I'm really sorry, Carrie.  That sounds awful.  The good news is that you and your passengers are all okay.  Don't feel too bad, accidents happen and I'm sure you won't repeat it.


I've learned my lesson too.  I've never actually fallen asleep at the wheel, but I have been miserable tired and it is an awful feeling.  My eyes get really wiered out when I'm super tired and i can't see the road properly.



__________________
rosie_the_riveter


Gucci

Status: Offline
Posts: 2994
Date:
Permalink Closed

That sucks.  But like the others have said, don't beat yourself up.  Everyone is ok and that's the most important thing.  It sucks about the damage to your car but you know, material things can always be repaired or replaced as opposed to a life.  Hope you start feeling better

__________________

Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
stylethread site home page -> stylethread forum -> general chat -> Keep having guilt...
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard