STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

kenzie · Chanel

I'm having the crappiest day!

Andrea Julia · Coach

You ARE having the crappiest day. I'm sorry, hon.

I remember all too well what it was like to answer the phone and have the person at the other end all pissed off because they can't speak to anyone that could help them. The worst is if your boss is actually there and you are getting it at both ends: the angry caller and the irritated boss saying, "just take a message." I used to have people call and then just call right back or say they will stay on the line until someone comes to help them. And then they would do that for 5 minutes and call back and say nobody has picked up so they are calling back. Well, DUH, I said no one was available. Some people are so darn aggressive over the phone.

How close are you with your boss? When you see him or her next week, can you mention that a guy kept calling and was getting hostile? Say you would have really liked to be more of a help to him and how could you have handled it. It really depends on how close you are with your boss though. If you have a snotty boss, he or she may feel it is not their problem. If they are nice, they (1) might offer you some tips on what can be said in the future with problem callers like this (2) if they know that person, they might put him in his place or (3) they may tell you you don't have to pick up the phone if nobody is around (I guess this is a little unlikely though if you are expected to answer the phone for the entire office and not just 1 or 2 people).

As for the boyfriend, I think you need some space. I don't want to say break up with him because I don't know what things are like for you and him the 99.99% of the time that you are not posting about him. I don't think it would hurt you to move back in with the parents or find a room to rent somewhere. You lived with him since before you were dating. Maybe you just need some time to "date" him. You kind of skipped that step which is understandable because you moved in together as friends and it evolved.

halleybird · Hermes

Oh, NylaBelle!

That is a major asshole move on the BF's part. You deserve better than that. I'm sorry.

Cortney1982 · Chanel

How about unhooking the phone if it is possible!

kenzie · Chanel

Cortney1982 wrote:

How about unhooking the phone if it is possible!

I wish. It's part of my job to answer the phone.

poptart · Coach

Ugh. I don't even know what to say except that all sucks. And your bf is definitely making an a**hole move.

JoceyBaby23 · Gucci

Your bf sounds selfish and uncaring.. in this situation anyway. Maybe you do need some space.. Think about it, you told him you would break up with him if he went and he's going??!!! He clearly doesn't care about your feelings and that is trouble!

rocky · Coach

JoceyBaby23 wrote:

Your bf sounds selfish and uncaring.. in this situation anyway. Maybe you do need some space.. Think about it, you told him you would break up with him if he went and he's going??!!! He clearly doesn't care about your feelings and that is trouble!

Agree about the BF, sorry about your horrible day! At least you have Monday off! Everything will seem better soon.

blubirde · Chanel

Wow Nylabelle - you're right. You ARE having a crappy day. I don't know what to tell you about work. It happens. And it sucks. But damn, your bf seems like such a jerk!!! (Or at least he's acting like one temporarily.) Maybe you should pack up and stay with a friend for a week or so and see how he likes it. He might rethink his shitty attitude then.

Hope everything gets better!

Lilykind · Hermes

***hugs***

I share ALL your phone problems...my job is essentially to answer phones and be at the beck and call of my boss. People are so impossible on the phone sometimes...so many stupid prank calls and calls from people who don't know what they're talking about and screaming people. Ugh! My boss did all the work should could possible do today and the phones are either dead or people don't understand why 2/3 of my bosses are gone. OK one is GETTING MARRIED this Saturday and the other is on VACATION. Don't people get this stuff?

Your BF is being a real asshat about the whole beach situation...I'm so sorry!

esquiress · Marc Jacobs

poor nylabelle, i'm so sorry. this sucks! i've never commented about the bf situation before and maybe i shouldn't start now so please disregard this if it just sounds like i don't know what the heck i'm talking about (because i probably don't!).

anyway, i mainly never commented because i really never felt like i knew or could infer anything even close to the whole story. a lot of your previous posts were written in reaction to specific incidents and more than anything the whole situation sounded really contradictory. like some of the things he's done have definitely seemed way out of line but it's hard to gauge because so many times, when you talk about the future, he definitely sounds like he plays a huge part in you planning yours. and you're such an awesome girl that i feel like well there must be alot of good in him for nylabelle to choose to think of her future and his as linked--like in your reply to greendiamond's budget thread, your post read like you and he were one unit and planning your futures together. but other times, like in this post, and the infamous worst.night.ever post, it's like you can't stand him. and then other times it will definitely sound like you went through something major w/ him but we won't have any idea of how you two handled it, like the pregnancy situation. so anyway, i've kind of pieced together an opinion that could be so far from reality but for what it's worth--

It's like you love the man that he has the potential to be but hate the boy he sometimes is.

if that's the case, gosh that just must be so difficult to deal w/. i guess my only advice is that maybe you could try to think about the situation when you're not necessarily reacting to a specific event. sometimes i feel like that is what gets us in trouble, reacting to someone else instead of figuring out what it is we want and then proactively going for whatever we've decided that is.

but anyway the only thing i know for sure is this: now is the time for faith, in yourself. because you gotta know that no matter what happens, nylabelle will be just fine, because she rocks!

Mandy · Kate Spade

you poor dear, thats a horrible day. people are so rude. they totally forget that you are at work doing a job and treat you like crap. i want to say, "do i call you at work and talk to you like this?"

your boyfriend sounds like he is being a bigger ass. if you guys were planning this trip together how can he uninvite you??? sounds like he needs some sort of wake up call to snap him out of this self-centeredness.

shopgirl82 · Chanel

maybe he actually did that because he's gotten away with it in the past without any MAJOR reprocutions. it sounds like one more time that he's picking his friends over you.....

you're worth more than that.

good luck with the situation. i'm sorry you're having a bad day.

kenzie · Chanel

esquiress wrote:

so anyway, i've kind of pieced together an opinion that could be so far from reality but for what it's worth-- It's like you love the man that he has the potential to be but hate the boy he sometimes is.

esquiress, you have articulated my exact feelings on the situation. And that's such a huge issue b/c I'm not sure where that leaves me. He's not always this idiot that he sounds like in this post (and the 'infamous' Worst.Night.Ever. post). In fact, most of the time he's a decent guy and we have a great time together. He's probably the most patient person I've ever met b/c I *know* that I'm not always so easy to deal with (especially when I'm stressed out, like during my old job/boss fiasco) and he's been really good with that. He lets me rant and rave and doesn't tell me 'shut up' or 'just deal with it,' like my ex did.

Our biggest problem is these two morons who he insists on being friends with b/c 'he's known them forever.' He just turns into a slobbering, drunk, idiotic frat boy when they're around. I just don't understand why he wants to hang out with these morons. He has other, perfectly normal, perfectly grown-up friends that he could hang out with, yet Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are still hanging around causing problems. I just don't get it.

I know someone (I think bumblebee) mentioned that she thought that he was baiting me to break up with him. I would agree, except this isn't the first time I've told him that I was going to break up with him. I don't think that he believes me. And I know him well enough to know that he doesn't bait girls to break up with him, he just breaks up with them. But, I do understand how you came to that conculsion, based on my post.

Anyway, I'm done with work now, so at least I don't have to deal with anymore jackasses calling me and screaming (although, I'd take that any day over the crap I had to deal with at the store!). So, the bf will be home from work in about an hour, so we'll see what happens. Thanks for your thoughts, ladies.

lsubatgirl · Gucci

Nylabelle - I hope your day gets better. At least work is over with. I know you don't wanna break up but sometimes it takes that wake up call to get the other person to start listening to you. That is what it took with my bf and me this past fall and we are much happier now since we took the time to listen and figure out what was wrong with our relationship in order to work on it. It may work for you and your bf but it may not. Just something to think about.