STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

It would depend on the type of guy he was.  Does he only want to go because his friends are going?  Because of the Superbowl?  Or because of the girls...? My bf thinks things like that are disgusting, but he might go if his friends wanted to go.  He'd probably get drunk, hang out with his friends, and make fun of the desperate girls.  He isn't the "type" to hook up with girls while his "boys" are egging him on.  His friends aren't like that either.  Now, if I was dating a crazy ex-Frat boy with a talent for these kind of things, I would definitely question his motives.

ok, here's my take on it:

there are certain things that single people can do that are perfectly harmless (e.g. "harmless flirting"), that exact same action if performed by a person in a committed relationship becomes not harmless at all but crosses the line to disrespectful to their partner. 

every person gets to draw their own line.  some are more liberal, others more conservative.  whatever, to each their own.

now, once a girl lets her boy know where her line is and he purposefully crosses it, well then, houston we have a problem.

So as for my friend (C) and her boy (S), here's how the rest of the convo went down:

he mentions the cruise.  she's like, "S, you know I'm not one to be at all uncomfortable w/ you hanging w/ your boys, going on trips to Vegas, etc. but a cruise where you are going to be in closed quarters w/ single girls, that's where I draw the line, I am not ok w/ that"    the he goes "Well the decision's already been made."  then she says "Then I guess I have to make the decision of whether to be with a guy that would do that" then he's like "you wouldn't break up w/ me" and she goes "try me."  (btw, you guys, i'm paraphrasing but that's the gist).

then later on he keeps bringing it up like "you'd really break up w/ me over this?" and she's like "S, why are we even discussing this?  you said you'd already made your decision.  now i have to make mine.  i'll let you know, maybe i'll break up w/ you before january so you can have as much fun as you want on the cruise."

Impasse.  This convo happened sat. night, she told us about it monday morning.  Oh another thing, she thinks she found the cruise they're going on and there are tickets left but they're like $560, she was kidding around saying she should just book a ticket for herself and charge it to his cc, ha!  oh and we have no idea if the tickets are already booked or what.  oh also, I have no idea if the cruise is sponsored only for singles or not, no clue if that's just C's take on what the cruise is or if it's actually called that on the brochures or whatever.

anyway, imo, he's testing her.  testing, testing, testing, like a little kid trying to guage how much he can get away w/ before he gets in trouble.  oh important sidenote, so y'all don't think S is a complete a**hole, he's always been a supportive bf and there are many stories of S doing really romantic things for C.  if I had to bet on it, I'd bet he's not gonna go on that cruise but time will tell I guess.

Thanks y'all I'll keep you posted!

esquiress, i don't have anything different from what the other ladies have noted.  but for me personally i would have a very hard time accepting this from my BF.  well, this is something my BF wouldn't do, but in imagining it, i would not be very happy!  like your friend, i would consider ending the relationship.  but like others have said, it depends on the situation and the history of the relationship.  a singles cruise, in my mind, sounds like a bunch of sunburned, drunk fools grinding on some dance floor like MTV spring break, and it makes me shudder!  if this guy has nice friends who respect his relationship with your friend, then i don't think they'd encourage him to stray or anything like that, but the whole idea of going on a cruise dedicated to singles (if it is indeed like that) is gross and disrespectful to her.  let us know what she decides to do!