STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

GucciGal19 · BCBG

Being a doctor and a mother?

lsubatgirl · Gucci

What kind of doctor do you want to be? I think a lot of it will depend on what you want to do. There are a ton of doctors out there with family and they just plan around important events. If they need to go to a ball game they just don't take appointments after 5 or something. I wouldn't not be a doctor because I want a family or not have kids because I'm a doctor. Its just like any other job. You have to make it all balance and work together.

Karina · Chanel

I had a friend growing up whose both parents were doctors - they had their practice in a separate division of their home. They were great, loving parents who were very involved in their 3 daughters' lives.

sfclinevandy · Coach

My dad's a doctor and he has 2 women with children working for him (they are both doctors too). Both women have small children and it seems like they do a great job of balancing work and family. I know they both use their moms to watch their kids while they're at work. I think it's definitely do-able. Do you know what speciality you're interested in? I know my dad's work schedule is pretty normal (he's a radiation oncologyst), Monday-Friday 8-5, 1/2 days on Wed, and even though he takes call he rarely has to go in on weekends or late at night. The women doctors have the same thing but just take different 1/2 days.

Being a doctor involves a lot of hard work, but once you get settled in your practice I think things fall into place. Plus, you never know what kind of job your husband will have so he might be a big help too.

Mia · Kate Spade

My cousin is a doctor - she was in school until her early/mid 30's and then had a baby (now she has 2) as soon as she started working. She married a guy with an MBA, and they have a lot of $, but she never (NEVER!) stops working. She is busy 24/7 and I think it has taken it's toll in small ways. I mean, she has a huge house in a posh neighbourhood, 2 expensive cars etc., if you look at her life from the outside it looks good. I just don't think I could handle being that busy all the time.

Also, you can see physically how it has affected her. She was beautiful when she was in her 20's, a lot of people assumed she was a model, and she now looks like a shadow of her former self, big bags under her eyes constantly, grey, tired skin, hair she doesn't have time to do anythign nice with. Maybe this seems like a small deal but to me, the trade-off isn't worth it. You have to decide for yourself whether it is.

You'll have a lot of $ and a prestigious job, but you won't have a lot (or any) time for yourself, or to pursue other interests outside your family and work.

esquiress · Marc Jacobs

quote:
Originally posted by: lsubatgirl
" I wouldn't not be a doctor because I want a family or not have kids because I'm a doctor. Its just like any other job. You have to make it all balance and work together."

i 100% agree w/ lsubatgirl. There's just no way to know right now how it's all going to work out. It kinda sounds like you want an assurance that you'll be able to 'have it all' or you don't want it. And the thing is, life doesn't come w/ those kinds of guarantees, it's all a process you know? at this stage in your life, i feel like you should take things a little bit at a time instead of trying to figure out what the end's gonna look like. because right now there are just too many variables (you might hate chem., fall in love w/ theatre, who knows?) to answer your q one way or another, imo. oh and remember this: if you think you like something, try it out, don't wait for it to seem perfect before jumping in. and once you're in it, if it doesn't seem right, then jump somewhere else. just have a little faith, you'll land on your feet.

RyanJ · Coach

My mom is a doctor and she was never absent. I have 3 brother/sisters and I always remember her there for plays, school activities, athletic events. I think it is very possible to have both a carreer and a family. My dad has a really demanding job, so quite frequently he would be out of the country on business trips, but they made it work.

You may need to get help with your kids. I remember early in her carreer she would be on call, so they hired a live in nanny. I know that is not always possible, but I think having relatives around to help w/ your kids would be a huge help.

I think it is entirley possible to do both. My mom is very succesful and is also a great mom.

-- Edited by RyanJ at 19:16, 2005-04-22