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Post Info TOPIC: Is it wrong to date this guy?
ShanKel


Kenneth Cole

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Is it wrong to date this guy?
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I use to be friends with a girl that i worked with for about 2 years but realized she wasn't really my friend- actually I don't even think she really liked me.  Anyways, she was dating this guy that she really liked but nothing ever sparked between them.  I had seen him out before I knew they were dating and always thought that he liked me but never acted on it.  When I found out that she was dating him it was no big deal.  It was kinda funny because i would tell her about this cute guy that i would always see at this bar I sometimes go to and we would just stare at each other and never say anything.  So we just laughed about it and that was it.  We stopped being friends about a year ago and they werent really seeing each other anymore.


Well, I was pulled over for running a red light(no I didn't) last week and to my suprise he was the officer.  We talked a little while, just catching up, and he asked me am I still friends with my ex-friend.  I told him we really don't talk anymore but there was no love lost (which is the truth).  He gave me his phone # and told me to call him sometime and maybe we could hang out.  I'm thinking he just wants to catch up with an old friend but my best friend who was in the car with me kept on saying its more than that and I should call him. She went on to explain that he had to make it seem like that because he knows we were friends and he doesnt know if i would go there with him.  She never liked my ex-friend anyway so I was not at all suprised that she would want me to call him. 


I dont think that I should call because....even though we aren't friends anymore, I know how much she liked him (and probaly still does) and wanted their friendship to be more than what it was but he just wasn't interested.  Also, I dont want to look like an ass and think its something when he's thinking we're just catching up.


Everyone I ask tells me that they weren't an item so it would be okay if I call.  What do you guys think?



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sage


Dooney & Bourke

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Oh, call him. There is a code which applies to dating the exes of close friends. I do not think it applies here.

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f413


Kenneth Cole

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He asked you out and gave you his # while he was on duty? hmmmm That just strikes me as a little "off" on his part.

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shopgirl82


Chanel

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are you more interested in a possible future with your ex-friend or this guy?  that's the main question.  if it was me, i would call the guy if i liked him...i would maybe say something like this..


if you got a ticket....


"i just want to call and say that i would love to hang out sometime, but i have to save some money since i have a ticket that i need to pay off"   maybe something along those lines...


 


or if you didn't get a ticket (which i hope you didn't)...


"i just wanted to call and say thanks for letting me go without a ticket"


i'm cheesy though



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D


Hermes

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Call him! - he was just taking advantage of opportunity. In my opinion, you have nothing to lose - you certainly don't have the ex-friend to lose, do you?


quote:

Originally posted by: f413
"He asked you out and gave you his # while he was on duty? hmmmm That just strikes me as a little "off" on his part."

eh - no more "off" than all the officers who have let me go without a ticket after flirting with them

-- Edited by detroit at 20:28, 2005-03-08

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rocky


Coach

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yah I would call him too, he obviously wasn't into your ex-friend, and you guys aren't even friends anymore.

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twinkle


Coach

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Definitely call him!!! It sounds like it was meant to be. How cute that he pulled you over And men in uniform, yummy.

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Dizzy


Marc Jacobs

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Call him! She's not your friend, he could be. And you don't owe fealty to acquaintances that don't treat you well. Good luck and enjoy!

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blubirde


Chanel

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I agree with everyone else. Call him! She's not your friend so you don't owe her any loyalty. That rule only applies to people you care about, not casual acquaintances (at best).


Call him!



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lynnie


Chanel

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" Also, I dont want to look like an ass and think its something when he's thinking we're just catching up." 


Just play it casual at first and you should be fine.  You'll see where it leads, and if there's chemistry, you'll BOTH know.  As far as the "friend", eh, forget about her.  She sounds just like an aquaintance.  I wouldn't tell her or anything, but I don't think you're doing anything wrong by exploring this.



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ShanKel


Kenneth Cole

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I knew I could count on ya'll to give me good advice which is just what i wanted to hear.  Sometimes we just need a little validation!


quote:

Originally posted by: shopgirl82
"  are you more interested in a possible future with your ex-friend or this guy?  that's the main question.  if it was me, i would call the guy if i liked him...i would maybe say something like this.. if you got a ticket.... "i just want to call and say that i would love to hang out sometime, but i have to save some money since i have a ticket that i need to pay off"   maybe something along those lines...   or if you didn't get a ticket (which i hope you didn't)... "i just wanted to call and say thanks for letting me go without a ticket" i'm cheesy though"

I'm definately not interested in a possible future with my ex-friend and no I didnt get the ticket. I kinda cheesy too so calling just to say thanks sounds pretty good to me. 

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laken1


Hermes

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I say call him for sure - you aren't even friends with this girl! Of course, that's coming from me who dated a guy my roommate dated - but hey, she was pregnant, getting married, and gave her blessing! BTW, we are still friends & he is history.

And on another note, I don't remember a guy ever in the history of the world giving a cute girl his number "to catch up" - he's interested. In my humble opinion.

-- Edited by laken1 at 22:33, 2005-03-09

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Andrea Julia


Coach

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I see no reason why you shouldn't call this guy.  Go for it!

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RyanJ


Coach

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I am not a big beliver of "fate" or "everything happends for a reason", but could it be anymore obvious that you suppose to call him? Of all the cops and of all the people he could have pulled over- this guy pulled you over. I think you should go for it.

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