STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

I find primers to be irritating, so I would say no (do others have exp with that?). 

My mom has a lot of ruddiness, and she found that Laura Mercier's TM works well to even out her skintone and be gentle on her skin.  I would recommend that applied with a brush for maximum coverage allowable from that formula.  It sounds like a TM wouldn't cut it, but I think it might for daily use.  Sample it first, of course.

Maybe look for a buildable-coverage foundation.  That way, you can put the least amount on for the sake of keeping down irritation--but you can put more on if you need to.

I don't know about other brands, but Bobbi Brown tells you which foundations are buildable.
www.bobbibrowncosmetics.com/templates/guides/foundation_finder.tmpl

I like the Extra SPF tinted moisturizing balm, but i don't think it would offer enough coverage for you.