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Post Info TOPIC: Why does this bother me? A vent.


Kate Spade

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Why does this bother me? A vent.
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Thanks!

-- Edited by subwolley at 21:52, 2008-07-07

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Marc Jacobs

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I think it depends on how you met them. Were they originally friends of your bf and now you all mesh together equally?


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Kate Spade

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They met my bf first, but I've known them for like 10+ years, and a couple of them do call me their friend. But I would say we all meshed equally, or so I thought. I'm sure it's no big thing, it's just an annoyance of mine.


-- Edited by subwolley at 15:47, 2008-07-07

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Kate Spade

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I have a very good friend I met through work - he's the only person I talk to on a daily basis and I'm pretty sure I'm about the same for him - yet he still introduces me as "This is my manager ..." blah blah -
what in the world. I haven't said anything, but it annoys me sometimes.

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Hermes

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I think if they're introducing you both at the same time, it makes sense. If they say "this is my friend and this is his girlfriend" I don't think it's to belittle your friendship with these guys so much as to let the people you're meeting know your relationship with your BF.

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Hermes

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I think if they're introducing you both at the same time, it makes sense. If they say "this is my friend and this is his girlfriend" I don't think it's to belittle your friendship with these guys so much as to let the people you're meeting know your relationship with your BF.

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Kate Spade

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ttara123 wrote:

I think if they're introducing you both at the same time, it makes sense. If they say "this is my friend and this is his girlfriend" I don't think it's to belittle your friendship with these guys so much as to let the people you're meeting know your relationship with your BF.



That's true, maybe it's their way of being respectful of the relationship.



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Marc Jacobs

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It's really hard to shake off the connection made by those who met first.  This introduction thing doesn't bother me because I look at people I know through my husband as "his friends" even though they're mine too--regardless of how long I've known them.

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Chanel

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subwolley wrote:

 

ttara123 wrote:

I think if they're introducing you both at the same time, it makes sense. If they say "this is my friend and this is his girlfriend" I don't think it's to belittle your friendship with these guys so much as to let the people you're meeting know your relationship with your BF.



That's true, maybe it's their way of being respectful of the relationship.

 



I agree. And guys don't really think about how they should introduce people anyway. I mean, what else would they say- "These are my friends A and B. They're dating"? It's probably just the easiest way to introduce you guys.

But it's totally normal to get annoyed by weird things like that. Everybody does from time to time.

 



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Chanel

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subwolley wrote:

 

ttara123 wrote:

I think if they're introducing you both at the same time, it makes sense. If they say "this is my friend and this is his girlfriend" I don't think it's to belittle your friendship with these guys so much as to let the people you're meeting know your relationship with your BF.



That's true, maybe it's their way of being respectful of the relationship.

 



I agree. And guys don't really think about how they should introduce people anyway. I mean, what else would they say- "These are my friends A and B. They're dating"? It's probably just the easiest way to introduce you guys.

But it's totally normal to get annoyed by weird things like that. Everybody does from time to time.

 



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Hermes

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ttara123 wrote:

I think if they're introducing you both at the same time, it makes sense. If they say "this is my friend and this is his girlfriend" I don't think it's to belittle your friendship with these guys so much as to let the people you're meeting know your relationship with your BF.



I agree as long as they're using your name. They aren't just saying so-and-so and his girlfriend..are they? I'm assuming they're saying "and his girlfriend, so-and-so."

I agree that it's just a way to establish your relationship to each other, although they could probably reverse it and intro you first and your SO as your boyfriend.


 



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Kate Spade

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Thanks everyone! I just needed to vent. For some reason I took it the wrong way. I never mentioned it before to anyone. But now I won't be so sensitive about it.

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Chanel

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I think it is meant as a courtesy. Similar to " Oh this is my friend John. We met each other in school." People want to know the connection/link without having to guess at it.

However, I agree that it can be construed (wrongly or not) as belonging to the man. I don't usually introduce people as "and their boyfriend John" or "and their girlfriend Amy" simply because I am sensitive about that kind of stuff. Most likely it will come up later. But I understand why people do it, and I don't fault them for it.

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