STYLETHREAD -- LET'S TALK SHOP!

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
stylethread site home page -> stylethread forum -> general chat -> lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Post Info TOPIC: lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Elle


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 7139
Date:
RE: lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Permalink Closed

Kinda late to this discussion, but wanted to chime in anyway.  While I don't think that I could be classified as a lurker on this board by anyone's standards, I am on another board.  I'm a lurker on that board simply because while I find the subject matter infinitely interesting, I have almost nothing to contribute to the discussions.  I highly value the information that I get from my lurking there and hope to have something to contribute someday, but for right now it's for informational purposes only.  In that way, I identify with ST lurkers, and I know (I think we all do) how awkward it can be to jump into posting as a newbie when it feels like everyone else in the room has been together forever already.


I found Fashionhag after it'd been around awhile and lurked myself for a couple weeks until I felt I knew the tone of the board a bit better.  And after I began posting I waited awhile to jump into any debates or touchy subjects until I was better aquainted with everyone and they with me, in the same way one would test the waters with a person they were meeting face to face for the first time.  I wouldn't feel it was appropriate to spark a heated debate with someone I was meeting IRL for the first time, and so it bothers me sometimes when 'new' people post strong opinions in less than diplomatic ways.  It's too hard to judge their tone and where they're coming from if we haven't 'known' them previously.


That said, because anyone can read this board without registering first it seems odd to me that we'd have so many registered true lurkers.  But I think they deserve to be here just as much as the rest of us do, and I wish they'd feel comfortable enough to begin posting in the future so we could get to know them as well as they probably know us.  It always makes me happy to see an new member introduction post .  It's weird to not be able to 'secure' this place because it means so much to many of us, but so are the perils of the internet.


Whew!



__________________
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment ~ {Ralph Waldo Emerson}
D


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 8209
Date:
Permalink Closed

Elle wrote:

It's weird to not be able to 'secure' this place because it means so much to many of us, but so are the perils of the internet. Whew!
Elle, can you elaborate on this? I'm not understanding what you're saying here.

__________________
"Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess." ~ Edna Woolman Chase
Elle


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 7139
Date:
RE: lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Permalink Closed


detroit wrote:






Elle wrote: It's weird to not be able to 'secure' this place because it means so much to many of us, but so are the perils of the internet.


Elle, can you elaborate on this? I'm not understanding what you're saying here.






Absolutely!  I think many of us could say that we feel like we're among friends here, and that the feeling is somewhat unique to find among internet communities.  I'm having trouble nailing down exactly what I'm trying to say here, so I came up with a really lame analogy for you!  Ready?  ST is like an IRL glass house - there are people inside, discussing various subjects (ie regular posters), and there are people outside, pressing their ears up to the glass and staring at everyone inside (lurkers).  My instinct is to want to close the curtains on those 'outside' and make them knock on the door and introduce themselves if they want to listen/participate with us.  You could literally pull the curtains in a IRL ST house because that level of privacy and security is something we can expect to get in the real world.  But because we are all in the virtual ST house, we are all subject to the relative lack of security and privacy that is the internet.  That level of privacy would be fine in your average, anonymous internet community, but for me this place crosses the Internet/IRL community line, and therefore makes me wish for the security we have IRL.


Is that any better?



-- Edited by Elle at 20:16, 2006-03-08

__________________
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment ~ {Ralph Waldo Emerson}
D


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 8209
Date:
RE: lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Permalink Closed

Elle wrote:

detroit wrote: Elle wrote: It's weird to not be able to 'secure' this place because it means so much to many of us, but so are the perils of the internet. Elle, can you elaborate on this? I'm not understanding what you're saying here. Absolutely!  I think many of us could say that we feel like we're among friends here, and that the feeling is somewhat unique to find among internet communities.  I'm having trouble nailing down exactly what I'm trying to say here, so I came up with a really lame analogy for you!  Ready?  ST is like an IRL glass house - there are people inside, discussing various subjects (ie regular posters), and there are people outside, pressing their ears up to the glass and staring at everyone inside (lurkers).  My instinct is to want to close the curtains on those 'outside' and make them knock on the door and introduce themselves if they want to listen/participate with us.  You could literally pull the curtains in a IRL ST house because that level of privacy and security is something we can expect to get in the real world.  But because we are all in the virtual ST house, we are all subject to the relative lack of security and privacy that is the internet.  That level of privacy would be fine in your average, anonymous internet community, but for me this place crosses the Internet/IRL community line, and therefore makes me wish for the security we have IRL. Is that any better?-- Edited by Elle at 20:16, 2006-03-08

here we go. here's our house



yes, I better undestand.  thank you



__________________
"Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess." ~ Edna Woolman Chase
valenciana


Dooney & Bourke

Status: Offline
Posts: 941
Date:
Permalink Closed

halleybird wrote:

But of course, I guess you never really "know" someone online. I could be the shoe-fetish guy for all you guys know.

Aha! I always knew it was really you, HB!  Heh...


Of course at least that guy posted...the creepier thing is if there's someone like that out there who really is just lurking and not exposing, er, making himself known.  Eeek.  But they could be cruising eBay auctions too...there's no way to avoid it with the nature of the internet.  Just use good sense in posting personal info, girls.


Also, I don't consider myself a lurker really...but I don't post as much as I have at times in the past (trying to avoid the temptation to spend so much on clothes mostly!)...but I'm with manhattanmonkey...sometimes i just don't have anything much to say...unless it's about Britney...



__________________
Life is short - buy the shoes.
honey


Gucci

Status: Offline
Posts: 2818
Date:
Permalink Closed

halleybird wrote:

honey wrote: hmm... i don't think of anyone who posted in "defense" of lurkers as a lurker. while i can't speak for halleybird i don't think she meant identifiable people with screen names, who just don't post regularly. i'm assuming she meant the random people who don't show up when you look at the bottom (i.e. 17 members and 25 guests). oh, and welcome newme! No, that's not who I meant at all. Lurking to me means someone who always reads but has never posted. And to clarify, I didn't mean that it's necessarily bad to lurk, and I didn't mean "shame on the lurkers."  It's just that if they don't post, we know very little about them, and I guess you never know who's out there. But of course, I guess you never really "know" someone online. I could be the shoe-fetish guy for all you guys know.
which is why i shouldn't assume things

__________________
www.musingsfromamall.com  (my main blog)
http://musingsfromamallinreallife.wordpress.com/ (my personal style blog)
halleybird


Hermes

Status: Offline
Posts: 6400
Date:
Permalink Closed

honey wrote:

halleybird wrote: honey wrote: hmm... i don't think of anyone who posted in "defense" of lurkers as a lurker. while i can't speak for halleybird i don't think she meant identifiable people with screen names, who just don't post regularly. i'm assuming she meant the random people who don't show up when you look at the bottom (i.e. 17 members and 25 guests). oh, and welcome newme! No, that's not who I meant at all. Lurking to me means someone who always reads but has never posted. And to clarify, I didn't mean that it's necessarily bad to lurk, and I didn't mean "shame on the lurkers."  It's just that if they don't post, we know very little about them, and I guess you never know who's out there. But of course, I guess you never really "know" someone online. I could be the shoe-fetish guy for all you guys know. which is why i shouldn't assume things

oh, I was agreeing with you! Sorry, I meant "No" as in I wasn't trying to say lurkers were bad. You were right...I don't consider anyone who posted a "lurker."


And because I forgot to say it before: Welcome, newme!



__________________
"We live in an age where unnecessary things are our only necessities." --Oscar Wilde
lindsayp


Kenneth Cole

Status: Offline
Posts: 437
Date:
Permalink Closed

wow, I had no idea this was going to turn into such a huge post!!

Halleybird: just wanted to clarify that in no way did I think you were speaking negatively about so-called lurkers. I just figured I'd take this opportunity to kind of explain why I just randomly pop up with contributions and then am silent for so long. I guess I just wanted you guys to get to know me some more. I'm kinda shy IRL and I guess that carries over to here.

It's kinda funny though, because I read this forum everyday and also get somewhat disturbed when a newer person says something I consider rude. I forget though that since I don't post much, it might look weird if I respond to that. I dunno, I just wanted to get that out there.

Detroit, thank you so much for picking up where FH left off and improving the forum and the community immensely!!

__________________
alb


Marc Jacobs

Status: Offline
Posts: 2322
Date:
Permalink Closed

Welcome to the forum, Newme!  I also loved reading your inspiring story and am glad you finally posted.  Congrats also on your pregnancy.  Will this be your first?

__________________
Alikat


Kate Spade

Status: Offline
Posts: 1181
Date:
Permalink Closed

Tara wrote:

I feel like sometimes the "regular" posters are so close that I am intruding on their space.  I really enjoy reading the forum, and I try to chime in whenever I have advice or strong opinions. However, a lot of the time I check out the forum as a "break" from doing my work, so I can only read for short amounts of time.  Thus, sometimes posting is out of the question.  I hate to be categorized as a "lurker" though, and I will try to be more of an avid poster!  As for "lurkers" who have never posted, I don't really see a problem with them.  I do think that we should all be very careful how much personal information we give out over this forum. 

This is exactly how I feel.  I'm an irregular poster, but totally enjoy the forum and it really has improved my fashion sense, like Newme mentioned.  I could understand why people are intimidated and haven't posted....  


Welcome btw, Newme! 



__________________
curiouscookie


BCBG

Status: Offline
Posts: 156
Date:
RE: lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Permalink Closed

Hi Girls,

I am a "lurker" too. I enjoy fashion and love looking at the pictures and ideas you ladies come up with.
I've posted occasionally but tend to be kind of shy at first. There are many reasons for this, I don't shop a lot, am on a budget and because I don't find things easily in my size and fit.
I have also only been in the States for the last 4 1/2 years. So I don't have the knowledge of stores and resources that are around from growing up here.
A first for me is participating in a board of any kind. I came upon ST in my search for articles and inspiration from websites on fashion and then realised it had a board that was even more fun and interactive!
I don't have too many girlfriends since I moved around a fair amount and everyone knows how hard it is to make friends once you start working. This place helps to feel like there is a great girl network :>
I've really enjoyed participating in ST, its made me more critical and aware of my style - not just throw on clothes coz I am running late... but enjoy the little twists in clothes and accessories. I hope it will build confidence in me so that I can actually give some input and not just ask questions.
Browsing the forum is my treat/break at work - but am often busy so don't come on regularly.

All in all I love being a part of ST and I hope you don't think me a "stalking" lurker but more of a curious one!




__________________
«First  <  1 2 3 | Page of 3  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
stylethread site home page -> stylethread forum -> general chat -> lurkers, spin off of "Men on ST" thread
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard