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Post Info TOPIC: i want to kill my best friend's husband
asf


Kate Spade

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i want to kill my best friend's husband
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the story is much too complicated to spill here, but one of my best friends since, like, 6th grade got married a little over two years ago to a guy she'd been with since high school (ten years total now, about 7.5 when they were married). 


he has totally checked out of their relationship and i don't know what to do for her.  he's being absolutely horrible toward her (not physically abusive, but definitely mentally) and refuses to talk about anything or try to work things out.


i just need to vent because i'm an hour and a half away and leaving on saturday for vacation and i feel like i'm totally abandoning her in her time of need.  she has other friends and her family around her, but still...ugh.


when i get back i'm confronting him myself.  i'm sure he'll tell me to f off, but whatever.  i cannot stand to see her so miserable.  it makes me want to cry.


grrrr



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freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose - janis
Mandy


Kate Spade

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awww.  i feel for your poor friend and i know its frustrating for you too.  sounds like his behavior is a new problem.  did something happen?  not that that makes it ok, i would just hate to think she has been going through that for 10 years. 

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asf


Kate Spade

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mandy - it's definitely a new thing.  i mean, they've had ups and downs like any couple but in the past month or so he's just changed somehow.  he hates drugs, so we know it's not that.  i'm pretty sure it's another woman but he swears he's not cheating and she's believing him so far.


eta:  that makes her sound kind of naive, and she's not.  she's being as smart as she can about the whole thing and not taking anything for granted - she's not an idiot - but there's no proof yet that he's cheating.



-- Edited by asf at 16:40, 2006-01-24

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freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose - janis
KE


Kenneth Cole

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I would agree with you that he's cheating-the signs are all too common and the 10 year mark is about the right time... :(

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NCshopper


Hermes

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Ughhhhhhhhh...how terrible!  I think if you just check in with her a few times while you're on vacation, she'd appreciate it and you won't feel so bad.  I agree with you and the other girls--sounds like he's cheating. 


Did you ever see the Oprah episode with Jen Aniston?  She was talking about emotional cheating and it sounds like that's what may be going on here.  Regardless of the physical aspect, he's not emotionally involved anymore which makes me think he's emotionally involved with someone else.



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blubirde


Chanel

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I agree that it sounds like he's got something else going on. Why else would he check out of his marriage? I don't know if it's cheating or sex or what but whatever it is, he needs to deal with it so he's not so terrible to his wife. Don't feel bad - you're doing the best you can.

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