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Post Info TOPIC: may be you girls are smarter than me....
ico


Dooney & Bourke

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may be you girls are smarter than me....
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b/c I can't quite understand what's going on.

ok, I had been seeing this guy for a while, like 3 years. Things were going nowhere, the whole relationship wasn't healthy, so I decided to quit. Completely: I left NY thanks to a new job, and I have been recovering since. I talk to this guy from time to time, and he was weird enough to ask me whether he has to get married to his now girlfriend who is pregnant (the baby is not his tho). If I had to speak my mind, I'd call the girl and tell her to run away from him as fast as she can, but it's none of my business, and I told him I can't tell him what to do.
This was the intro.

Yesterday he calls me to whish me happy birthday. We talk like 2 minutes, than I say I have to go b/c I was watching a movie.

Like 10 minutes later, he calls me again and asks me why wouldn't I go to NY for a couple of days, and stay in his place! Note: I have left NY almost 2 years ago, I don't regret my decision, and I haven't seen this guy for 1 year!

What sense does it make? What the hell is he thinking? Doesn't he have enough trouble already? Ah, I forgot: his gf is really jealous of me, he told me that, b/c "she thinks I am really nice looking", and that's the best compliment I ever got from him, even if it was indirect.

please, I need your opinion, b/c I need to know I am not the one who is not making any sense...

tia

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ico


Gucci

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Sounds like he is in yet another unhealthy relationship.


You did the right thing by moving away. Now it seems you will also have to change your phone number.


You sounds like a strong person, keep it that way and stay as far away from him as possible!



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-jocey-


Coach

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He sounds like he just wants what he can't have. He probably wants you back or wants you to want him again, he thinks you visiting NY would make it happen. Asking you about his pregnant gf was probably a move to make you jealous. That is just my take on it though.


 



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Kate Spade

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agree... you left so you wouldn't have to deal with his problems, and now you are..indirectly. lol
It sounds like his life is a mess and you seem to be very strong and smart, he needs you to come and "rub that off" onto him. DON"T DO IT!!! If it was me I wouldn't even be listening to his crap, let alone going to see him and jumping into it with him. Tell him to ask his mom. Stay away!

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ico


Dooney & Bourke

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hey, you girls make a lot of sense, you know?

No need to change the phone#, I am very good at filtering the calls (I have done it!). I actally was planning to go to NY, but I'd stay with a girlfriend and to say anything to him (with some luck we wouldn't meet, and if we do, well, too bad!)

I think he is not missing me or wanting me back. He is missing being at the center of attention!

thanks!

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ico


Chanel

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ico wrote:


hey, you girls make a lot of sense, you know? No need to change the phone#, I am very good at filtering the calls (I have done it!). I actally was planning to go to NY, but I'd stay with a girlfriend and to say anything to him (with some luck we wouldn't meet, and if we do, well, too bad!) I think he is not missing me or wanting me back. He is missing being at the center of attention! thanks!


I think you make a lot of sense. You sound like you know very well that he's not the best person to be around. Without exception (and I mean that), every ex will always come back to test the waters at some point. I don't know why they do it but they do. Don't waste your time dealing with his crap (this is my new motto - my time is too precious to allow someone to drag me into drama). He's a weirdo and looking for trouble. He's probably looking for a way out of his current relationship and doesn't have the balls to actually do it himself. Was he like that with you? I abhor guys like that, unfortunately most of them are like that.


If you run into him in NYC, just look fabulous and be polite but don't engage. It will make him want you more but you can't help that. His loss after all!



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ico


Dooney & Bourke

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blubirde wrote:



Without exception (and I mean that), every ex will always come back to test the waters at some point. I don't know why they do it but they do. Don't waste your time dealing with his crap (this is my new motto - my time is too precious to allow someone to drag me into drama). He's a weirdo and looking for trouble. He's probably looking for a way out of his current relationship and doesn't have the balls to actually do it himself. Was he like that with you? I abhor guys like that, unfortunately most of them are like that.
If you run into him in NYC, just look fabulous and be polite but don't engage. It will make him want you more but you can't help that. His loss after all!




It's true, they always come back. I hadn't realized that...
Yes, he was like that with me: not able to say things upfront until forced with his back against the wall. Example: he went to Germany for 8 months, when he came back he was strange but we were still hanging out. That was end of Aug. Right before Christmas, when I really pushed him, he admitted there was a girl in Germany he was so in love with that he wanted to propose! How much of an a** is he?
ANyway, I am gonna print your motto "I am not gonna waste my time dealing with his crap" in big letters and hang it wherever I can see it. This is so right!
thanks

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ico
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