I recently met a guy on an online dating service. He initiated our online conversations. We talked on the phone about 4x, maybe more, before he asked to meet up in person. We went on a date on a sunday....we went to play miniature golf and afterwards he asked if I wanted to go get a smoothie afterwards. Before the date ended, he asked if I wanted to hang out again next Sunday. I said yes. We hugged goodbye....then about 20 minutes after the date he called to say he had a good time and that he'd call me the next day.
Well he didn't call. So by Wednesday I decided to text him to see if he was having a good week. He responded and we texted back and forth for awhile.
Thursday night he calls and we spoke briefly and then he had to go. We didn't mention going out again on sunday....he said he'd call me the next day.
Well he didn't call me the next day, or saturday. By Sunday I decided to text him to see if we were still hanging out. He responded saying he couldn't until later because he had other plans. Then he never called me!
I'm so confused! My sister says "he's just not that into you." Which I would agree except for the fact that he was the one who asked me out again and was really sweet about calling me back later to say he'd had a good time. My instinct is to forget it and never call him again.
But then part of me just wonders what the heck happened? It's so odd!
I know you really want to know what happened, but honestly there is no telling. He did seem to like you, but maybe he met someone else or got back with an ex. Guys sometimes spook (bad ones do anyway) at the first sign of commitment and feelings and stuff, maybe he got weirded out. Regardless, I'd go with your instinct and write him off and let it go. At least you haven't invested much time with him.
A similar thing happened to me several years ago. I think the guy might lack assertiveness to the point that he will ask a girl out even though he may not want to. He might do it just to reduce anxiety. Also, sometimes an old flame pops back into the picture with no warning - but he won't tell you that. I agree that you should look for another awesome guy online. That's where I found my husband in the end!
It sounds like he was conflicted between you and someone else. I feel like he was using you as a cushion for his plans and kept stringing you along but then something else came up, making him lose interest!
I agree with your sis in that, obviously, he's just not that into the whole thing with you and him, because if he was he'd make the time to see you. (Btw, I hate that phrase "he's just not that into you," fwiw.)
Bottom line? He's a douche. Guys who play games (for whatever reason) are sooo not worth worrying about. List him in your phone as "Douche #1" or #2 or however many you have, and make a general rule to not accept phone calls from douches.
As to what happened, he probably liked you but something came up that overshadowed his initial attraction, i.e. an old girlfriend, a new girlfriend, a football game, scratching himself, whatever. Best to avoid the flaky gameplayers. You have my sympathy.
Well, thanks for listening everyone! I'm trading info with a few other guys right now on this online thing. We'll see if anything genuine sparks from them. If not, at least I tried, right?