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Post Info TOPIC: I think I was slightly violated on the train today...
XtinaStyles


Marc Jacobs

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I think I was slightly violated on the train today...
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I took the subway today, so happy that the weather is finally getting nicer. I wore a wrap dress and knee high leather boots. I sat "like a lady", kept to myself, sorta zoned out with my ipod on. There was plenty of room where I was sitting, then the person who was sitting next to me left the train and a guy sat down. Suddenly, he was sitting SO CLOSE to me. I realized he was not really sitting but like "leaning" against me, not leaning back in the seat, there was plenty of room for him to sit back. I also realized he had his hand on my thigh! It was like his hand was on himself but he was pressing himself against my thigh. When I noticed, I slammed my purse on his hand, he moved, then I started making phone calls so he got up and stood directly across from me (like 3 feet) facing me, staring. I was so pissed. I didn't know what to do bc he was big and scary.

I hate that these things happen and I hate that I can't do anything about it and I hate that I can't wear a pretty dress without being molested :(

Just wanted to vent.

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jacL


Coach

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I am sorry that happened to you.  It really sucks that things like that happen so often. 

When I am alone on a train or bus, I put my bag on the seat next to me (still holding it of course so it doesn't get snatched), as long as there are still a few empty seats for other riders to take. 

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~Jaclyn
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Hermes

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I'm so sorry that happened to you.  I can totally feel your pain.  I take the El everday here in Chicago, and last year, I was standing on a crowded train and had a guy grab my a$$.  Talk about ballsy - I was so pissed and felt so violated, I clocked him in the face.  People can be such freaks!

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Collette


Chanel

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Wow I'm so sorry this happened to you. It must have been so disgusting. But you need to remember it's not ok for people to touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable. Speak up, say something! If there were other people on the train you'd be ok.
ShopChicago33, I would have loved to see you clock that guy. I would have started applauding!

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I'm thinking balls are to men what purses are to women. It's just a little bag, but we feel naked in public without it. Carrie Bradshaw
dangergirl


Kate Spade

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shopchicago33 wrote:
I was so pissed and felt so violated, I clocked him in the face.

well done! i'm sorry that this has happened to you both, i can't believe how horrible some people are



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Dizzy


Marc Jacobs

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hate that this happens too (it's a typical night out at the bar in a college town). And it is REALLY important to take control and confront him. People cannot touch you without your permission. And they know that. They're just hoping you will let them get away with it.

If he's scary and has friends around, just ask in a neutral tone what he's doing? Like, "Are you touching me on purpose?" "Did you know you just grabbed my butt?" And keep a straight face. If he says something like, "Yeah, what are you goign to do about it..." You can either go with, "I guess I can't do anything about you being an ass who can't' get laid." And turn away. Or you can just say, "You want to grab some stranger's butt on purpose? Really?" And turn away. Just say something about it and get out of there.

I don't always know the exact right thing to say, because relaly, there is no right thing to say when smeone is tyring to make you a victim. But I do know that the guy who's pretending not to notice he's touching you is looking for people who wont' confront him. He's a predator. And you have to tell him no and get away from him.

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